Hericane. [sic]

In pre-dawn stillThe wind comes once everyThree minutes, bellowing deep in the treesSlow, picks up speed, then stops. dark ghost trainwinds down, swapping arrivers fordepartersWhose gossamer trench coating shuffle wetLeaves adhere, our front window stained Chapel glass between worlds. Warm and dry,tamed storming, unpredictable rowdyTimetables of bluster and agenda, measures of syncopated nature, theruthless spiced... Continue Reading →

Balancing Act.

Somewhere between being born and being adopted, abandoned people learn that being pleasing means you're less likely to be left behind (again). If you're funny or engaging, kind, people might like you - you might even make some friends. If you're funny or smart or have some special talent or hobby, you might find your... Continue Reading →

Less than Perfect.

After pulling back from reunion almost five years ago, I find myself wondering 1) how could I have handled that better and 2) was I supposed to set expectations or boundaries, and 3) is there any reparation to be made? For most of my life, making any decision was difficult and very uncomfortable. When open,... Continue Reading →

entre frères et sœurs

Entre. French for "in between"; not "entrée" like the main course of a meal. Freres, brothers. Soeurs, sisters. You can puzzle-piece the title of this post.One of many outcomes of my adoption reunion was siblings. My sibling tribe grew, exploded really, from one sister - with whom I was raised - to seven altogether. We... Continue Reading →

Friendless and Fallen.

In the 1901 Directory of Social and Health Agencies of New York [State]..., Volumes 11-13; Volumes 16-19, in chapters titled Cheap Meals, Lodgings, and Baths and Reformatories for Women, you will find a listing for the place my first-mother stayed while pregnant with me.  Despite decades between the first mention of this "Home" for unwed... Continue Reading →

The Un-Natural Father.

A young male and a young female have sex. Years ago, a medium said my conception "feels like it was very...abrupt.  And aggressive."  I have no idea what happened only that the Female became pregnant. Male has no interest in 1) any relationship with the female past the one (was it more than one?) night... Continue Reading →

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